Prayer requires consistency. We pray when we’re sad. We pray when we’re happy. Take things slow for now. Begin with the rosary. If you can’t do the whole thing, you can start by saying the Our Father, 10 Hail Mary’s, Our Father again and close with your intentions and give thanks. That’s how I started. Then as days progress I added another set of Hail Mary and Our Fathers. Some days I could repeat the rosary 5x in one sitting. Those days were the tough days. Those days I say pray as much as you need.
Eventually you come to a point where the words will roll out automatically and you begin to consciously think about each word and what those words means to you. Eventually the words from each prayer makes a vibrant sounds only you can hear. And eventually you come to a stillness and that’s when you listen.
In the beginning you’ll be distracted by your thoughts. Welcome them but don’t entertain them. Remember this is just the beginning so it’s okay to drift away at times. Forgive then focus back to your Hail Mary’s.
I think in the beginning it’s just learning focus.
The most calming thought – whether our time of prayer (meditation, solitude, …) went well or not – is relying on the fact alone that Someone is/was listening to you. I think many of us feel unworthy, unimportant and unloved, or that our voice and words mean nothing so we belittle ourselves to a point where we become unknowingly destructive to ourselves and the things around us. So when we pray and really feel the presence of Someone listening, it gives a boost to our self esteem and our worth. Ultimately you are giving yourself permission to be loved. It is you that is giving and receiving your love. In the end, you are the love that you deserve. That’s prayer.
with you always,